Singer Asa Talks About Depression And Losing Her Virginity In Interview With Funmi Iyanda
The interview which was recorded in 2015 sees the multiple award-winning singer, who is 35 now, get real honest about a number of things including losing her virginity at the age of 28, dealing with depression and more.
If The Sex Was Good
yes It was good. I didn't stop. It was good, it's been good since and I think I got a late start. When I was young, a little girl, I wasn't allowed to be a girl at that age, I was a woman already. I was already standing on the stool to cook for my family and my mum always told me since I was born, soon you are going to be someone's wife, so this is how you going to do. Since I was born, I was always groomed to be someone's wife.
So at 28years, can you imagine, I am talking to my mum, Mum there's a problem (laughs), she thought that when I was 18years and when I told her I am going to studio, she said oh that's what you do in this studio? I know what you are upto! You know, it hurts me because I was like Mum, I am doing this for you. She didn't understand and then there was a news and she said oh she is....
You know what hurt me most? Because I had not tried it yet. And they have given me a name.
At 28years, I decided. I chose it. I said, you come here, this is what you gonna do, this is what you gonna do. We don't have to be friends and after the business is done we shake hands and do not call me until I call you.
The other thing I would tell you since I am a woman of a certain age, it's get better as you get older.
Talking about Bed Of Stones
Actually at that time, he was no body. He was just a dream, fantasy, just projecting what I wanted. I was always, (stammers) that was a time in my life were I said ok you have, if you want to find somebody, you have to get up and go out and search.
I was always searching in the house and hoping one day he will open the door and so I remember and there was a comedian who made a joke...girls when they are 20, they have list of the kind of person they want and I had a list. I wanted a tall guy and thats all I wanted.
I wanted a dark and handsome and then at 25years I decided to tweak it a little. I was still a little bit top. I wanted him/he has to be tall, I dont want no Artist and then at 28years, I will say if he is 4ft tall, I will be ok but it was a little bit and the tweak was... Laugh and now I want him if he is 4ft tall, no problem but he should be able to buy me my shoes and my bags because at 25/28years I had already started buying all those things, i have been responsible for all those things, No I don't want no man who I will have to take care of now and then at 28years, that was when I called Janet my Manager, i said there is a problem, I called my mum and said there is a problem.
I told her so many things that she was shocked. I was actually a very late starter and my mum had no advise, the only thing she could shyly share was hmmmmm it could be painful at first, I was like what is this woman saying?
I was shy, I was also very, i was somewhere else, i was in the place were I needed to carry the world on my shoulder and I needed to be straight, I needed to focus in my career, so I wasn't thinking about that aspect and of course I was still seating in the house thinking he will just come up and I will just say I am here for you, I have been keeping for you.
On Tour that caused her Depression
I was. I didn't know I was until we stopped and I lost words about me, i gave so much, every night it was, we always had to give 200%, I was so naked in front of the people. When I came back, it took a while to get back to the normal me, it was disturbing, a little bit depressing, I did go into depression and then I took the trip, i said its better to go somewhere new, somewhere different, and also really to meet people, just to see people.
On Album death again about?
You (Funmi) are part of the inspiration for this song because I remember when we sit down at Coffee shop, we had conversations and I listened to you talked and then you said oh its like someone picked up the knife...and so with all clicks or less than 2hrs it was done and I sang it with the anger still in me that I couldn't sing it again. I just couldn't sing it. This version you have is a demo version because each time I try to redo it I lost the fire, I lost the purpose, I have almost even moved on from there.
Sometimes the process of writing this songs come like this and sometimes they don't. A lot of times they don't come. Until I have to go to find inspiration. I have to sit down where ever and find it because it is almost technical, it's like handwork, like sewing, you really have to go for it.
If The Sex Was Good
yes It was good. I didn't stop. It was good, it's been good since and I think I got a late start. When I was young, a little girl, I wasn't allowed to be a girl at that age, I was a woman already. I was already standing on the stool to cook for my family and my mum always told me since I was born, soon you are going to be someone's wife, so this is how you going to do. Since I was born, I was always groomed to be someone's wife.
So at 28years, can you imagine, I am talking to my mum, Mum there's a problem (laughs), she thought that when I was 18years and when I told her I am going to studio, she said oh that's what you do in this studio? I know what you are upto! You know, it hurts me because I was like Mum, I am doing this for you. She didn't understand and then there was a news and she said oh she is....
You know what hurt me most? Because I had not tried it yet. And they have given me a name.
At 28years, I decided. I chose it. I said, you come here, this is what you gonna do, this is what you gonna do. We don't have to be friends and after the business is done we shake hands and do not call me until I call you.
The other thing I would tell you since I am a woman of a certain age, it's get better as you get older.
Talking about Bed Of Stones
Actually at that time, he was no body. He was just a dream, fantasy, just projecting what I wanted. I was always, (stammers) that was a time in my life were I said ok you have, if you want to find somebody, you have to get up and go out and search.
I was always searching in the house and hoping one day he will open the door and so I remember and there was a comedian who made a joke...girls when they are 20, they have list of the kind of person they want and I had a list. I wanted a tall guy and thats all I wanted.
I wanted a dark and handsome and then at 25years I decided to tweak it a little. I was still a little bit top. I wanted him/he has to be tall, I dont want no Artist and then at 28years, I will say if he is 4ft tall, I will be ok but it was a little bit and the tweak was... Laugh and now I want him if he is 4ft tall, no problem but he should be able to buy me my shoes and my bags because at 25/28years I had already started buying all those things, i have been responsible for all those things, No I don't want no man who I will have to take care of now and then at 28years, that was when I called Janet my Manager, i said there is a problem, I called my mum and said there is a problem.
I told her so many things that she was shocked. I was actually a very late starter and my mum had no advise, the only thing she could shyly share was hmmmmm it could be painful at first, I was like what is this woman saying?
I was shy, I was also very, i was somewhere else, i was in the place were I needed to carry the world on my shoulder and I needed to be straight, I needed to focus in my career, so I wasn't thinking about that aspect and of course I was still seating in the house thinking he will just come up and I will just say I am here for you, I have been keeping for you.
On Tour that caused her Depression
I was. I didn't know I was until we stopped and I lost words about me, i gave so much, every night it was, we always had to give 200%, I was so naked in front of the people. When I came back, it took a while to get back to the normal me, it was disturbing, a little bit depressing, I did go into depression and then I took the trip, i said its better to go somewhere new, somewhere different, and also really to meet people, just to see people.
On Album death again about?
You (Funmi) are part of the inspiration for this song because I remember when we sit down at Coffee shop, we had conversations and I listened to you talked and then you said oh its like someone picked up the knife...and so with all clicks or less than 2hrs it was done and I sang it with the anger still in me that I couldn't sing it again. I just couldn't sing it. This version you have is a demo version because each time I try to redo it I lost the fire, I lost the purpose, I have almost even moved on from there.
Sometimes the process of writing this songs come like this and sometimes they don't. A lot of times they don't come. Until I have to go to find inspiration. I have to sit down where ever and find it because it is almost technical, it's like handwork, like sewing, you really have to go for it.
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